Thinking & Feeling

“The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.” Horace Walpole

Friday 29 May 2009

How to break an Affrikaans Accountant...

*Long story short* We have an horrifically slow and inefficient SQL query here that interrogates about 1M records etc etc and right at the end it decides to actually check the date range required... DUMB!

Anyway I just logged a job to archive anything older than a year, since in 90% of cases more than that is not needed, and to optimise the code as well. This query is resulting in about 1000 slow SQL query emails a week (as in over 25 seconds slow!) of course the 1000 emails slows the network down further.

Hey it's my PA today, so I am doing a little 'see how proactive and innovative I am' trip ;)

Anyhoo. I ran it by the accounts manager who I am on very good terms with. He was ok with it, or at least he pretended to understand what I was talking about.... but then pretended he was upset about 'losing' all the history.

He came past a while later and said, 'I feel diluted' to which I chirped, 'Don't you mean truncated?' and he was like 'Huh? Don't confuse me with your big words' to which I replied 'Ok, let me ameliorate that' ... I think I broke him ;)

Later I am going to ask him if I can concatenate something for him ;)

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